Scientists claim that we’re currently doing a reasonable job at a mass extinction but not nearly as good as the huge rock that struck Mexico around 65 million years ago. Regardless of what the top five extinctions tell us, the planet is fine, always has been, probably always will be. It appears to have a fairly nonchalant response when it comes to mass extinction. Before you start frantically commenting on why a mass extinction is bad, if they had never taken place, today we would not have sharks and cars, two of my favourite things.

Corvette Mako Shark

That being said, we have to enjoy our short but sweet time here and so far we’ve been pretty busy. Thankfully for me, fellow curious human beings make movies about sharks and cars. Obviously I’m not here to talk about sharks but I was thinking about my favourite retro motors in movies.

Without doubt in my mind Anton Furst’s Batmobile is one of the coolest retro on screen motors of all time. His design work on the bleak metropolis of Gotham was second to none and to have produced a very striking and timeless Batmobile was no mean feat. With inspirations from war machines, aircraft and art deco styling, the final result was the perfect driving machine for a super goth. Batman was charismatic and cool back then, the car was purely an extension of that. With a turbine driving the midnight black machine, it looked every bit intimidating as it did sexy, with its winged rear end and the aircraft like cockpit in the centre.

Twin browning machine guns mounted at the front, armour plating and a grappling hook, need I say more?

The Bat Bastard

In George Millers depiction of the future in Mad Max, a massive percentage of everything has died (Probably including sharks) with the exception of humans and cars. Not just any cars though, modified beasts with armour, guns, spikes and flamethrowers. Whilst there is something refreshing about a world without the Nissan leaf, tax returns, governments and police. The world in which Max lives is rather bleak and unforgiving. What better way to see the day through than mowing down members of a tyrannical biker gang with an armoured, nitro fuelled V8, a Ford Falcon to be exact.

The interceptor was the product of Barry, the seemingly mentally challenged mechanic in Mad Max. Despite his impairment he was quite handy with a spanner and put together what is arguably the meanest looking vehicle for a protagonist. “She’s the last V8, she sucks Nitro!”.

I could go on and mention all the most obvious super star cars, The Back to the Future DeLorean, Ecto 1 or the five hundred bond cars but as a car guy, I think we should all take a moment to remember those unsung heroes of the big screen. Those cars that got people from A-B or a car you saw only for a few seconds before it was blown up by an overzealous director. Knowing what kind of money these relics go for now, I watch some scenes through my fingers.

Take the Ford LTD for example. A large lumbering “yank tank” from as far back as the 60’s, which, in all of it’s variations, ran until the end of the 80s. If you’ve seen any films within this era, you’ve seen many of these land boats smashing into other cars, people, chasing criminals dressed as a smokey or simply driving entire families around in it’s vast expanse of an interior.

For the fans of the synthwave community I guess the go to movie is The Terminator. Kyle Reece came from a future war and needed some muscle. What better vehicle to steal than a sixteen foot long, two and a half ton V8 sedan. With a 0-60mph that could be measured on a sundial, 12 mpg and all the handling of an abused shopping cart, I guess the only bonus was that it was incredibly comfortable. The sheer size and weight was probably Kyle’s saving grace, because if Sarah Conner was born in Europe, Kyle would have stolen a Fiat and subsequently the Austrian death machine would have picked it up and thrown them in the sea.

In a sort of car “cos-play” the Ford LTD has been most memorable in retro movies as the Crown Victoria, in fleet use they were used for primarily police or taxi markets. Again you may remember it as the cop car used to getaway from the T1000 in Terminator 2, similar cruisers in Universal Soldier or from the hundreds of scenes of taxi rides in your favourite movies. The LTD is truly an on screen icon, from action films to crime thrillers, the LTD was stuntman, sidekick, for good guys and bad guys.

Throughout the 70s and 80’s car wrecking was a big draw for Hollywood. Ron Howards Grand Theft Auto (now overshadowed by the multi million dollar gaming franchise) was a wrecking-fest. Dozens of cars, now considered cherished automotive icons, were rolled, crushed and launched into untimely deaths.

If you want to see some of the best chases and stunts, check out Junk Man. Henry Blight Halicki, nickname, Junkman. A stuntman, director and a bit of a lunatic. Using his own vast collection of vehicles, he wrote and starred in Gone in 60 seconds, Junkman and also made a sequel to Gone in 60 seconds, aptly named Gone in 60 seconds 2.

Grab a copy and some popcorn and enjoy some automotive carnage!

Much like poor ol’ Roy Batty, we don’t always get what we want in life. Then again he did live in a world of deep poetic melancholy, sex androids and flying cars. There’s no pleasing everyone.
Christmas shouldn’t be a time of mass consumption but we all should have a wish list for one thing or another though. Having wishes means perhaps you’ll strive to do whatever it is to get there, whether it manifests in reality is another thing but it’s good to have vision.

My wish list has always been cars I guess, as materialistic as it may sound, anyone who has read previous articles knows that this is far from the truth. Driving is an art, car design is art, they bring people together and shared experiences are the best. They become iconic, in the design world and in our everyday worlds, they keep us moving forward.

Cars that appeared on bedroom wall posters, with beautiful women draped over the bodywork for good measure. Cars that evoked vision, adventure and wonderment. They were showcased in quick and clever advertisements that compared them to fighter jet innovation, rousing emotion and almost life changing experiences. Today car commercials are about as exciting as watching someone write a book. Now it’s often some closed road driving sequence with the added excitement of rain to some breathy cover song by a busker.

So without further ado, here is my wish list

1968 Ford Mustang Fastback “Bullitt”

One Saturday afternoon in the late 80s my dad sat me down and produced a VHS tape with the name “Bullitt” written crudely on a TDK white label. He gave me a brief rundown of the plot but the main reason for this little showing was THE car chase. Lieutenant Frank Bullitt is assigned to protect a VIP with a small team. In short, it’s no cakewalk and during the operation Frank is targeted by a couple of hitmen driving a Dodge Charger R/T. The hunted becomes the hunter when Frank turns the chase and manages to ram the men off the road, they then plough into a petrol station and explode, burning to death.

It wasn’t the last shot of the chase that stuck with me, where the passengers hair has nearly all but gone and the sound like bacon sizzling from the cockpit. It was the brutal, snarling sound of the V8 through the streets of San Fran, Steve McQueen’s slick double clutch technique and his effortlessly cool behind the wheel. Because I never shut up about it for the next twelve months, because my dad and I bonded over it, to this day I believe it’d be the first on my list if I won a lottery.

De Tomaso Pantera

I’ve said it before and I’ll said it again, if you don’t walk away from your car and look back at it, you’re driving the wrong car. The De Tomaso Pantera would have me walk away, come back, make sure it’s locked, walk away again, look back, take an easel out and start painting. The Ford V8 in this thing, makes for a jaw dropping start up. I’ve never had the pleasure of driving a Pantera but it is said to be a raw, highly strung machine that doesn’t care much for city driving but would rather be hammering along a highway. Where as the Americans used a big V8 as a tool to get an oversized car moving, the Italians utilized the lump to create a gorgeous display of engineering in the rear of the car. The interior for me is just right too, gated gears, a leather and chrome theme throughout with only a stylish colour palette option. Google it I think you’d agree.

Porsche 911 (930)

I’m ashamed to admit I was young enough to have watched Condorman back in the 80s and enjoyed it. The film didn’t do well at the box office for reasons I haven’t got time for but my lasting memory of this film was the bad guys fleet of murdered out 911’s. Watching these old films now is sometimes hard to watch, cars which now are considered sought after were often beaten like a bad step child. In Condorman, several 911’s were burnt and subsequently thrown off a cliff face.

If like me you browse IMCDb for instances where a car pops up in a film, you would know that Porsche have had a generous mention throughout hollywood and regular TV shows and documentaries. I love the profile of the 930 and the whale tail for me is the icing on the cake. In my dream garage I’d probably use this as a daily, testament to the build quality a large percentage of these classic Porsche’ are still on the road today.

In all honesty I could probably list ten of my dream cars but just these three would have me grinning for a few years. Like and share Retro Motors, comment and tell me what your dream garage would be!

All of these films make sense as starting points for their own reasons, but the truth is Marvel got started on film a little more than 50 years before Blade. That’s right: there was a serial film called Captain America released in 1944 (and you’d better believe you can watch it on YouTube). It’s kind of fascinating, though a 1944 film predates what we’d typically refer to as “retro” by about 30 years. 

Fortunately, there’s a sweet spot in between the very first Captain America film and the modern frenzy of superhero films. Many don’t realize that there were actually four Marvel movies made from 1986 to 1994. Here’s a look back at each one. 

Howard The Duck (1986)

Howard the Duck is among the most ridiculous Marvel comic characters ever created, and that’s saying something. He’s essentially a large duck with human-level intelligence, super strength, and expertise in “quack-fu” who’s known as a grumpy and satirical character. And strangely enough, he may actually have a place in the MCU. Howard the Duck appeared in the end credits scene after Guardians Of The Galaxy, and he was even involved in the Civil War comics that Marvel’s adapting into Captain America: Civil War this May. 

But the 1986 film was just about Howard. Co-produced by Universal Studios and George Lucas (yes, the George Lucas), the film was about a citizen of “Duckworld” (like Earth, but with Ducks) being accidentally transported to Earth, where he quickly becomes a kind of ornery guardian to a woman named Beverly. That’s about all there is to it (other than the fact that Tim Robbins had a supporting role), and the film was pretty much a disaster. In fact, according to an old LA Times article, there was even a rumor that two studio executives came to blows over finger-pointing about who green-lit the project, which earned only $1 million more than its $35 million production budget. 

The Punisher (1989)

The Punisher may just be the hottest character in Marvel right now following Jon Bernthal’s portrayal of the character in the recently released second season of Netflix’s Daredevil show. Reviewing the season, Gizmodo claimed it was finally the adaptation that the character deserved, implying that a number of previous efforts fell short. 

1989’s The Punisher, produced by Live Entertainment, was the first of those efforts, and one that went straight-to-VHS in the U.S. It had a few fun things going for it: namely, the casting of Dolph Lundgren as Frank Castle (aka Punisher), and an endless stream of high-octane action sequences. To an extent, that’s what fans of this character want. The Punisher is an uncompromising and morally questionable vigilante, and in this film we basically got to see him take down as many mobsters as he could find in 79 minutes. The issue for critics was that it was a little too barebones. Light on plot and lacking even The Punisher’s signature skull logo (Lundgren pretty much wears plain dark clothes), it did feel a little lazy—but not without its fun moments.

Captain America (1990)

Needless to say, Captain America has become one of the central characters of the modern Marvel universe. And while it looks like more of an ensemble project, this spring’s Captain America: Civil War will technically be part of the character’s current, ongoing series. What’s interesting about that series is that it’s done a pretty good job of displaying most of the classic Captain America visuals and storylines we’ve seen for nearly a century’s worth of comics now, as well as in previous films. 

The 1990 film played a role in establishing that flavor, so to speak, for a Captain America film, which isn’t to say it was any good. In fact, this movie probably got more criticism than any other project on this list. Still, fans of the modern movies who go back and watch this one might be surprised at the basic core of the story (Steve Rogers becomes a super soldier during World War II, battles Red Skull, and end up frozen in ice), as well as the general image of the character, and how much both resemble today’s Captain America. Another fun fact about this one: the lead actor who played Rogers, Matt Salinger, is the son of famous author J.D. Salinger (who wrote The Catcher in the Rye).

The Fantastic Four (1994)

The most interesting thing about the 1994 version of The Fantastic Four, which was produced by Constantin Film Production but ultimately went unreleased, may actually be the characters’ uniforms. Modern Marvel has gone with a darker take on the costuming, with the 2005’s film black-and-blue version serving as the new standard. Gala Bingo features a Fantastic Four casino game that still shows off this uniform from the 2005 film despite the fact there’s since been another reboot. Indeed, as a slot reel rather than action video game, the focus is almost entirely on the image of characters, furthering the black-and-blue approach. 

Meanwhile, the 2015 reboot went with a nearly all-black approach. However, in 1994 we got a delightfully campy blue-and-white version that does have a place in some of the old Fantastic Four comics. The suits lend a comedic factor to a movie that really needed one to survive. Saying it survived may be a stretch, but there are some good things to be said about this film. For a B-movie operating with a virtually non-existent budget, it took itself lightly and told a faithful story of the superheroes’ first battle with Dr. Doom.

So there you have them! The four films that bridged the gap between 1944’s Captain America and 1999’s Blade. This is the retro chapter of Marvel, and while there’s not a success among these four films, there’s a lot of fun to be had in going back and checking them out for real Marvel fan—or for those who like to chuckle at old, campy projects.

This Month In Retro is a monthly article where we look back on the current month as it happened during the 1980’s.  Learn, reminisce, and stay retro.

In film:

The Elephant Man premiered to tremendous success, both critically and commercially. As far as David Lynch films go, this is the least Lynchian. It’s still an excellent film that Lynch detractors even tend to like. It stars John Hurt and tells the story of Joseph Merrick (named John in the film), a freak show attraction with a deformed body. The cruelty of the average person he encounters is absolutely heartbreaking.

Fade to Black was also released in October of 1980.  This is a film that is underappreciated and overlooked. The protagonist is a disturbed young man with an obsession with cinema. He spends every spare moment at the movie theater or watching films in his bedroom. He idolizes the characters he sees and incorporates their phrases and mannerisms into his own life. This gradually pushes into some pretty transgressive territory as he drinks the blood of a dead prostitute (because Dracula) and kills a man while in a noir gangster costume (because White Heat).

It’s like Guy Debord and Jean Beaudrillard saw Scream and decided to have a baby.

In music:

October of 1980 saw the release of two really incredible (though in many ways opposite) albums, Remain in Light by Talking Heads and The River by Bruce Springsteen. The latter shows the Boss refining his craft and tackling the sort of themes found in previous albums with more maturity. The music on The River reflects a greater pop sensibility, slightly departing from the darker mood of the aptly titled Darkness on the Edge of Town. The double LP manages to consistently deliver well-written songs, with some standouts being the beautiful title track and “Hungry Heart”, a song Springsteen had originally written for the Ramones.

Remain in Light is noteworthy for the risks it took and the success with which it landed its ambition. It frequently appears on best of lists for both the 1980’s and all time.  The composition and production of the album is pretty unique, which is to be expected with the eccentric kind of genius that accompanies both David Byrne and Brian Eno. The instrumentals were based on loops and samples, which is fairly redundant at this point. A lot of genres are built on that principle, but in 1980 we didn’t have FL Studio, Reason, or i7 processors. This was groundbreaking.

Aerosmith also released a greatest hits album in 1980. Try not to think about that too much.

Billboard #1 Song of September 1980: “Another One Bites the Dust” by Queen

In comics:

Lex Luthor fell in love with a woman named Angela Blake who briefly made him turn good. Kudos to DC for including a bald-headed woman. These retrospectives are realing making me question Lex Luthor’s dedication to evildoing. They got married, but then it wound up being a plan somehow to get Superman. Pre-Crisis DC doesn’t always make sense.

Reid Fleming: World’s Toughest Milkman was self-published by David Boswell. It was later picked up by major distributors. The first volume has never gone out of print and has become a cult hit. The series is bizarre and playful, taking full advantage of comic book hysterics to tremendous effect.

NRW and Scytron Ent. is proud to present an upcoming film that is sure to blow your socks off!  Before we say any more, please check out the teaser below!

This is sure to be an awesome production. The only thing needed here is a fitting retro sound for the “Wasteland” soundtrack.

ABOUT

Wasteland: Tales from the Desert, Pt. 1″ is the first installment of the upcoming feature-length sci-fi film “Tales from the Desert”, a film showcasing five interconnected stories on a brutal desert dystopia known only as the Wasteland. Toxic cosmic rays bombard a haggard landscape where everyday folk struggle to eke out a living. Outlaws run amok in search of wealth, fame, or a way off of the violent world. Sky Marshals patrol the deserts with an iron fist, laboring to keep law and order for an aristocracy living on a moon high above. In a world of grit and despair, does anything ever change?

PLOT

Wes and Aubrey, two nomadic outlaws on a secret mission in the desert Wasteland, uncover a mysterious object worth more than either of them has ever known. They soon end up in a life-or-death stand-off over it, a stand-off made more complicated by the arrival of a rifle-toting stranger by the name of Edson Laramie. Who will leave the Wasteland alive?

“The film is a short derived from a feature-length film script. The short will be used to raise further investment money to produce the full feature.”

For all the retro producers out there. We need your submissions to make this soundtrack a success. Specifically the darkwave and cyberpunk specialists. If you guys reading are interested, please submit your songs to us directly at the following email:

su*********@**********ve.com

 Please make the subject line read: 

“Wasteland Movie Soundtrack Submission”

We are accepting all artists at this point in time and working with” Gray Day Films” to find suitable artists to contribute to the soundtrack.

Connect:

https://www.facebook.com/WastelandTalesMovie

http://www.wastelandtalesmovie.com/

– Stay Retro

            BREAKING NEWS: I really wish I knew of these screenings earlier this week to give you all a better heads up. But, If you happen to live in the New York Tri-state area and looking for the ideal date night activity weekend… Well this could the answer to your problems.

            “The 15th edition of Film Comment magazine’s essential, eclectic festival brings you a lineup of the coming soon and the never-coming-back, the rare and the rediscovered, the unclassifiable and the underrated. This year opens with Electric Boogaloo: The Wild, Untold Story of Cannon Films, a hilarious tell-all oral history of the exploits of schlockmeisters Menahem Golan and Yoram Globus in ’80s Hollywood, followed by a three-film retrospective of some of their greatest hits.”  –  Film Society Lincoln Center

Friday February 20th 2015:

Venue: WALTER READE THEATER

●       Electric Boogaloo: The Wild, Untold Story of Cannon Films
Mark Hartley | 2014 | DCP | 106 mins
Opening Night preceded by a cocktail reception open to all ticket holders!
Q&A with director Mark Hartley, actresses Catherine Mary Stewart & Robin Sherwood, and Superman IV screenwriter Mark Rosenthal
This off-the-charts hilarious piece of film history is an instant classic thrill ride that recounts the taste-challenged exploits of Israeli producers Menahem Golan and Yoram Globus, who stormed Hollywood in the early ’80s, to produce epic amounts of schlock.

            Friday, February 20th. Start time 8:30pm

●       Ninja III: The Domination
Sam Firstenberg | 1984 | 35mm | 95 mins
An action-packed but cut-price cult classic, featuring arguably one of the Go-Go Boys’ most ludicrous plots—an aerobics instructor and telephone repair woman is intermittently possessed by the spirit of a Black Ninja who uses her to exact bloody revenge on the cops who killed him—Ninja III: the Domination marks the ne plus ultra culmination of Cannon’s Ninja martial-arts obsession.
Friday, February 20
10:45pm

February 21, 2015

●       The Last American Virgin
Boaz Davidson | 1982 | 35mm | 92 mins
An early Cannon hit, this leering but ultimately surprisingly serious-minded teen sex comedy is a mash-up of Porky’s and Fast Times at Ridgemont High with a trio of suburban L.A. youths chasing girls and competing for the attentions of a cute transfer student
Saturday, February 21
1:00pm

●       10 to Midnight
J. Lee Thompson | 1983 | 35mm | 101 mins
In the second of six films Charles Bronson would make with Cannon, he plays an LAPD detective fired for planting evidence on a serial killer who murders in the nude—and when his daughter becomes the next target in the ensuing grudge match, it’s a case of “Forget what’s legal, do what’s right!” as the film’s tagline went
Saturday, February 21
3:00pm

●       Shock Value: The Movie—How Dan O’Bannon and Some USC Outsiders Helped Invent Modern Horror
John Carpenter | Dan O’Bannon | Terence Winkless | Alec Lorimore | Charles Adair | 2014 | DCP | 80 mins
Presented by USC archivist Dino Everett & author Jason Zinoman
For this unique feature-length compilation, archivist Dino Everett has assembled the student-film work of Dan O’Bannon, John Carpenter, and others who helped redefine the horror genre in the ’70s, to demonstrate that USC was a hotbed of genre filmmaking.
Saturday, February 21
7:30pm

February 22, 2015

●       Gremlins (Preview Cut)
Joe Dante | 1984 | 35mm | 112 mins
A rare screening of the test preview cut of Joe Dante’s scary-funny Christmas from Hell creature-feature classic that includes five additional minutes.
Sunday, February 22
1:00pm

            For more detailed information as well how to see more for less with a 3+ Film Package or a $99 All Access Pass! @ http://www.filmlinc.com/films/series/film-comment-selects-2015

(Source – http://www.filmlinc.com)